just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
