I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
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