My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
How many fucks given?
0.12846
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Randomize
