hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
