she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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