sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I party with great urgency now.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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