White coat. Heels.
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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