this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
