My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Randomize
