youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
