I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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