why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
