I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
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