you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
