He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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