so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
