is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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