i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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