i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
