i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
