So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
you didnt know i had herpes?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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