I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize