We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
