We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
