So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
