Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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