A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
All I want is dick and wine.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
