wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
