do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at templeÂ
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
