I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
