I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize