he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
