We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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