I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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