ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
