what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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