I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize