so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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