Christians are straight up FREAKS
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
You were trust falling into bushes
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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