Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
