Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
