she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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