i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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