Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
