Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
