I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
