I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
