Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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