I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
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