so explain again why im purple
no
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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