Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
