Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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